As a follow-up to his 2007 film, Planet Terror, Robert Rodriguez's new and long-awaited feature, Machete, had some pretty big shoes to fill.
As a follow-up to his 2007 film, Planet Terror, Robert Rodriguez's new and long-awaited feature, Machete, had some pretty big shoes to fill.
The film, which hit the box office last Friday, stars Danny Trejo as the legendary Machete, an ex-Federale agent who must hunt down the people who framed him and killed his family. With a cast consisting of such big names as Robert De Niro, Jessica Alba, Steven Seagal, and (for whatever reason) Lindsay Lohan, Rodriquez is basically begging you to go see his new movie.
But beware, my dear readers, as you may be in store for a bit of a letdown.
It seems that every movie that has come out in the past decade has one thing in common: a trailer that has ruined the actual movie-watching experience. Every funny segment, every explosion or action sequence in a film is taken out of context and thrown together in a three-minute montage so that when you finally pay to go see the movie, there's nothing you haven't already seen in the trailer. And, unfortunately, Machete was no exception.
From the looks of the film's trailer, I thought Machete was going to be the epitome of over-the-top action and unnecessary gore. When I first saw the trailer, I was reminded of Rodriquez's previous film, Once Upon a Time in Mexico, also about a proud, Mexican badass. I thought to myself, "Ok, so they replaced Antonio Banderas, the mariachi, and gave him a machete. I can dig that."
But whether it was because I had such high expectations or because I had anticipated so much more blood and gore, I left the theater with the ever-slightest feeling of disappointment. There is even a scene in the trailer where Danny Trejo's character opens a trench coat, revealing 30-some machetes and throwing knives strapped to his body. But after seeing the movie, I can't say that I remember this ever really happening. Talk about a letdown.
With that being said, I must also note that Machete was probably the most entertaining film I've seen all year. As a whole, Machete has more shootouts, boobs, and ridiculous one-liners than any other action movie I can recall. And with a political overtone about illegal immigration and America's border control issues, the film is sure to have a little something for everyone—every guy, that is. And in case you forgot, let me remind you Jessica Alba stars in the film. That's basically reason enough to go see it.
Although I don't think it was all it was hyped up to be, Machete is surely the best thing to come out of Texas since the T-bone steak.
Grade: B-
Franklin Innovation Challenge returns: second annual contest
The Franklin Innovation Challenge, a contest for F&M students with innovative ideas, is preparing for its second annual competition.
Shadek stadium
Laurence Shadek ’72 and the Shadek Family Foundation will donate $5 million to the College to help build a new multi-purpose stadium that will be located on the north end of campus.
Sixers might actually be for real
It was many and many a year ago,
Wrestling focuses on youth, conditioning
This past Friday, the wrestling team fell to Columbia University, 32-12, at home at the Mayser Center.
Jon Salandra loves winning, dunking
“I love dunking,” said Salandra. “I’m not gonna lie. Dunking and winning.”
Squash teams on hot streak
As the days of January wind down, the victories for F&M’s women’s squash team keep on coming.
Swimming makes good use of break
Both the men’s and women’s swim teams have put in a lot of work for the rest of their 2011-2012 seasons.
Women's Basketball wins third straight
Triumph and success are the words to describe the women’s basketball team during the month of December, as teams like McDaniel, Gettysburg, Haverford, Randolph-Macon, and Scranton all lost to F&M.
Occupy Needs to Disperse, Reevaluate Objectives
It’s a scene straight out of Baghdad, Afghanistan, or Pakistan: The American flag, engulfed in flames, surrounded by angry protestors defaming the United States. For those who truly love this country, those images hurt a little.
To Flee From or Find Fruitfulness in Fly-By Fridays
Quite an interesting epidemic is sweeping our campus.
Hertsgaard Talks on Generation Hot
In the presentation of his book, HOT: Living Through the Next Fifty Years on Earth in the Bonchek Common Room on Wednesday, journalist Mark Hertsgaard discussed the current climate crisis, its future impacts, what he sees as the good news, and what actions we can take to combat its effects.
Crown Fried Chicken Provides Southern Comfort
People say that Pennsylvania consists of Philadelphia, Pittsburg, and Alabama in between. If that’s the case, and we are living in the otherwise called “Pennsyltucky,” then where’s the fried chicken?
Feminism in a Modern Context
The first Women’s Center Discussion of the semester took place last Friday. The topic was “I’m not a feminist, but...” and the participants reflected upon the various meanings associated with being a feminist.
Forni Discusses Civility on Campus
Dr. P.M. Forni, professor of Italian literature and co-founder of the Johns Hopkins Civility Project, spoke about the importance of good manners and respect during Common Hour, entitled “Choosing Civility on Campus and in Life.”
The Descendants Transcends Book
As January draws to a close, the buzz about who will take home the Oscars this year increases.
Five Movies to See This Semester
Five must see movies to see this semester:
Samson’s Provincial Offers Bright Side to Dark Winter
John K. Samson’s sophomore full-length Provincial perfectly suits this mild winter: soft yet up-beat, somber but hopeful—bright notes stick out in these melodies like blades of grass in melting snow (please refrain from envisioning brown grass for the sake of your figurative viewing pleasure).
Die Hard Should Be News to Noone
If you haven’t seen Die Hard by now you should say three Hail Marys and then rush to Netflix. It’s simply inexcusable. It’s one of those movies that forces you to describe other movies as being “Die Hard on a boat” or “Die Hard on a plane.” Directed by John McTiernan, it combines everything you’ve ever liked about an action film into 133 minutes of edge-of-your-seat thrills. If you like the action genre even a little bit then Die Hard is definitely a classic, and maybe even your favorite movie.Bruce Willis plays John McClane, an NYPD police officer traveling to Los Angeles to stay with his two little girls for Christmas Eve and hopefully patch up a rough spot in his marriage with his wife Holly (Bonnie Bedelia). McClane is too dedicated a cop to leave his city behind and start a new life with Holly after her major promotion sends her to L.A., but he makes the trip anyway to surprise her at her office, which is on the thirtieth floor of a massive state-of-the-art sky scraper. Unfortunately, he is not the only surprise, and, while washing up in the bathroom, he misses a group of machine-gun-toting German terrorists take everybody, including his wife, hostage. The shoeless hero takes to the air vents with a gun and his bad boy New York attitude to pick off the Fabio-looking thieves one by one while he attempts to crack the mystery behind the takeover.While the terrorists, led by Hans (Alan Rickman), try to break the computer codes to get into a vault holding six million dollars in bonds, McClane is able to get his hands on a radio transmitter and contact the outside world and, more importantly, desk-cop Al, played by Reginald Veljohnson. Unfortunately, the terrorists also have radio transmitters. This opens up a confession-like dialogue between hero McClane, head terrorist Hans, and former cop-in-the-field Al. This radio correspondence gives the viewer a sense of McClane’s humanity and vulnerability, but it also gives insight into Al’s crippling past–and most importantly Hans’ rapidly weakening plan. The fun is heightened because none of the characters know what the good guy or the bad guy looks like.People who see Die Hard for the first time now will say the same things: “Those were high-tech computers!?” “Look at the old-fashioned hair styles,” and “Isn’t that Snape?” Once you get used to the vintage 90s look and the fact that the good cop is Winslow from Family Matters, you’ll settle down and strap yourself in for the ride. Yes, the catchphrases might be a little cheesy, but they make each quick kill more fun and enjoyable. Plus, everything you want to happen will always happen. Machine guns rarely run out of ammo, the hero is always giving away his location and confronting terrorists, things go boom, tanks explode and people jump off skyscrapers tied to makeshift fire hose bungee cords. Die Hard is an essential action film, unlike the sequels that follow (Die Hard 2, Die Hard With a Vengeance, and Live Free or Die Hard). There are some anti-climactic cut-aways, but for the most part the movie packs punch after satisfying punch. If you call yourself a fan of the action genre then you have to see this movie. There are plenty of die-hard Die Hard fans out there who love watching it over and over again, quoting every line.
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Rick Santorum, 21st Century Puritan
If you’re one of the millions who have viewed the third Google hit under the search term “Rick Santorum,” you’ve probably laughed, sighed, or clicked the “like” button linked to Facebook. But whether or not you like him, Rick Santorum is still a contender in the Republican Presidential Primary.
Two New Restaurants in Pandini's
When students returned from winter break, they quickly discovered changes to the dining location in Steinman College Center.
New Cardio Equipment in the ASFC Contains Interactive Features
Over winter break the Athletic Department replaced the cardio equipment in the Alumni Sports and Fitness Center (ASFC) with new bikes, treadmills and ellipticals from the manufacturers Precor and Expresso.
Dining Options Fall Short
The first week of freshman year, the number of dining options so readily available seemed overwhelming.
Supreme Court Conservatism
“For a reporter covering the Supreme Court, this is not just a good year, it is a great year, a fabulous year, a genuinely historic year, but funny, it is not,” said National Public Radio’s legal affairs correspondent, Nina Totenberg, during Common Hour.
Weis House Implements New Recycling Program
Weis College House has new plans for “going green” and changing the recycling habits of its students this semester.
College chooses First Class of STEM Posse Scholars
Ten students from Miami have been chosen to take part in the College’s first Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics (STEM) Posse program, which is an extension of the Posse Scholarship.
Say Nope-A to SOPA
In the meantime of searching for the name of that song from the latest Twilight movie or Facebook stalking that guy or gal you recognize from class but can’t quite put your finger on from where, you might have found that suddenly—oh no, what is this?
Surviving Syllabus Week
As the first week of classes comes to a close, I find I am still scrambling for classes.
Marie Antoinette
Marie Antoinette probably never said “Let them eat cake,” since the infamous jest, which is actually taken from Jean-Jacques Rousseau’s Confessions, was published when the disgraced Queen of France and Navarre was the nine-year-old Archduchess of Austria.
Romney's the Man
The 2012 Presidential election is in full swing.
Contraband Lacks Thrills
This January thriller doesn’t aim for the stars and neither did Baltasar Kormakur, director of Contraband.
